Tuesday, 12 April 2011

It's a mistake! #destructogang

Many of you who are on Twitter will know about #destructogang - a group formed by @MissPishPosh consisting of anipals who destroy things.

Is this the face of a destroyer?

Well, I received a membership badge from the UK badge distributor @RealJoanneK. I'm sure you'll all agree that the design by @super_nat is lovely, but I think there must have been a mistake! I'm not sure why I have been included in destructogang - I mean it's not as if I destroy things!

Sniffing to check it's for me
Definitely my badge

There may have been a few *ahem* incidents that have occurred implicating me, but I can explain them all (Your Honour).

For example, this rope toy was cleared damaged by the friction of the floor, therefore not my fault it became a little dishevelled.


The ball on the rope pictured below was a health & safety problem. I had to shorten the rope to prevent injuries to the humans (they get a bit tetchy when their legs get bashed during ball flinging). It also made the toy more ergonomic for the humans. So you can see what a selfless dog I am sacrificing my toy enjoyment for the love of my humans.

Health & safety nightmare.

The ring toy below was purely adapted for educational purposes. I think it shows my academic potential. Not sure I can do the whole alphabet with it though!

This used to be an "O"
Now it's a "C"

When I help with the gardening, Owner sometimes misinterprets it as destruction. 

See? The pruning worked a treat!

Just pruning the loganberry!
Mum & Dad have a problem with rabbits in their garden.

The photo below may look like I was destroying the toy, but as it was during the World Cup Football games, you can't be too carefully with security. Someone has to check for bombs. I didn't get any thanks for my bravery though.

I know it looks bad!

Owner sometimes takes random photos of broken stuff. I'm a bit annoyed really because it makes it look as if I did it!

I wasn't there & you can't prove it was me.

OK, OK, I'll admit that this ball was damaged by my teeth, but if Owner buys inferior quality balls I can't be held responsible for the consequences.

Brain sculpture

Owner brought this disaster on herself. She put some treats in the end of my toy, so I had to get them out somehow!

Why didn't she just give me the treats?

Sometimes there's no getting away from the odd accident. If a ball accidentally gets caught in my teeth & the fluff on the outside gets caught up occasionally the ball "falls apart".

Who said balls were supposed to be round?

 Of course there are times when a dog has to carry out a mercy mission. Free the squeak is an active mission.

Free the squeak

It's in here somewhere
So you can see, it's clearly a case of mistaken identity!

I'm an innocent dog!


  1. BOL!!

    *Ahem* I mean...I have no idea why you would be inducted into the #destructogang. There is surely a difference between proper security measures, providing adequate safety in one's home and keeping the garden from overtaking the house. Maybe it is some kind of conspiracy...*looks around wild-eyed*...to make it LOOK like you are the destroyer of all toys?!?

    *whispers* I will keep my eyes and ears open for signs of a 'conspiracy plot' against you.

  2. Well, you haz obvioulsy been falsely accused my friend. I see nuffing bit proper attenshun to sekurity and elf & safety here.

  3. I loved reading this Millie! Ya gave us lots of smiles. We thinking of putting you forward for doing Market Research on durability of all doggie toys. These things must be done and you are the best dog for the job! Love your furiend AnnieB

  4. BOL! What a wonderful post. You are a great example to me, and I shall try to meet your high standards of security, safety and all-round general helpfulness to humans

  5. I bow down before the master (or should that be mistress) of destruction. You are a legend in your own lifetime.

  6. Hehehe, I propose MILLIE to be PRESIDENT of the #destructogang - she is obviously WELL QUALIFIED !! Aaaaaaarrrroooooooooo!!!!!