Friday, 20 January 2012

Dogs' Ten Commandments

It has been brought to my attention that I have been slacking on the blog front, so as discipline has been lacking I thought it would be good to go back to basics and re-visit our Dog 10 commandments:

1. Love your Owner - they have paid the equivalent of a lot of tennis balls for you, or they rescued you from a tricky situation.

2. Do not love fake owners. Sniff humans carefully before you let them pat you, and if possible get treats or toys (watch out for Cruella Deville).

3. Don't growl at your Owner. If they are doing something nasty like trimming pawnails a little grumbling is permitted, but only if you look guilty and lick them afterwards.

4. Try not to work at all, but if you have to, get plenty of rest. This is not restricted to Sunday as we have 4 legs we need more rest than the bipeds.

5. Do what your Furmum and Furdad tell you or they will prod you with their nose and may nip you. Don't worry, this is usually short term until you are taken to your forever home with Owner.

This is where dog commandments vary slightly to the human ones...

6. Destroy toys if you fancy - get the squeaks and stuffing out if possible. (But only toys, not our stuffed friends on Twitter). If you can catch a real squirrel you will be held in the highest esteem.

7. You may hump other dogs but it is polite to at least sniff noses or bums 1st.  It's not necessary to hang around afterwards. If the Owners don't like it, it makes your life easier if you do what they say.

8. Don't get caught stealling. If you do, try walking slowly and really close to the ground. Alternative measures include hiding, grovelling, licking Owner, or if really drastic measures are needed try being good for a while.

9. If at all possible, try to pass the blame onto someone or somefur else. If you are lucky to have a Brofur or Sisfur you could always blame them, but remember they might try that tactic on you too.

10. Covet all toys, treats, food, comfy chairs, and human beds. Remember that what you have is yours, what you want could be yours, what you can get is yours.

Most of all have fun and live life to the full.


  1. Bravo ... Bravo from one Millie to another. But of all these comandments the most impawtant is surely No. 10

  2. I agree with Millie, Millie. No 10 is definitely the most impawtant. Gosh, all these Millies sure does get confusing sometimes.

  3. This is a great post, Millie. It applies directly to my schnauzer life!

    Nubbin wiggles,